Hoodwinked

Hoodwinked Past:

I think Fidel Castro has been dead since at least July 2006. Sure he's made "appearances" since then... but have you noticed how they've all been on TV, or the Internet? It doesn't appear that any agent of the U.S. has physically seen the dictator since then. Photoshop can do amazing things and we all know that those Cubans are some smart cookies...I think we've been hoodwinked.

In commemoration of Castro's life and legacy I put together a small poetic tribute at my ward's Poetry Night.... here it is (it's really bad so don't get your hopes up!):

Cuban Castro

early in Sunday's contest

ignited global relations?

a figurehead

unequivocally

directly

mythically

like the loch ness monster

and north dakota

there comes a point

where nobody talks

they change the fact

the revolutionary

exert control over

daily activities

command the respect

because loyalty

has been so closely tied

Hoodwinked Present:

I had my first bad e-bay experience this week. I love e-bay and while I am not nearly as fanatical as my older sister (who has bought tea pots off e-bay), I do love the sniping of last minute bidding and the anticipation of good feedback. My friend Melanie's birthday is today and she adores Thomas Kinkade (I can't stand him but that's why we get along so well). Off e-bay I bought some screensaver software so that she could enjoy his total ubercuteness overload all the time (so thoughtful of me). When the package arrived I was very excited and opened it up to find...."3D Animation with Maya 6." Wow. That's really not useful. I've since e-mailed the seller but have not received a response. I may have to call my dear sister to see where to go from here to nail those Hoodwinking e-baying punks.

Hoodwinked Future:

I have somewhat (and only somewhat) facetiously vowed that I would not vote for a presidential candidate that did not promise to abolish No Child Left Behind. (I won't get on that soapbox right now, but if you're ever interested let me know...but let me just say this and I quote North Carolinian John Edwards, one of the few really smart things he's said: "You don't make a pig fatter by weighing it"). Well, that ruled out all of the Republican candidates. What do the Democrats have to offer. Bill Richardson agreed it needed to be stopped, but he dropped out (very sad). As recently as the end of December, Barak Obama agreed it needed an "overhaul" and Hillary stated it needed to "end." I guess my decision has been made. But wait....there's still the fact that there are a few things about good ole Hillary that make me a little bit nervous. What's a good American voting girl to do? No worries! I've heard that in some political circles, the 5th time's the charm! Well on Sunday, Ralph Nader announced he's back! (I knew he would be...he has been for 20 odd years of my life so why not now?) I think this year is his year. He's going to hoodwink us all and take us into a new life of hybrids and solar power...it's gonna be great!

Lil Blue

Often in my psychoeducational reports I comment on whether or not a student met 'developmental milestones.' Usually this means if they crawled, walked, talked at the time you would expect them to. A lot can be said by when those students met those milestones and so if there's anything unusual we like to make note of it. Often people are surprised by these questions, but are thankful for the chance to look at their baby's memory book once again.

Well I don't have any babies, but I do have 'Lil Blue and he had a milestone today... Here's how I'd write it in his memory book (if he had one)

Came home: September 19, 2007

Mileage 9/19/07= 270

Been at home: 5 months

Mileage 2/19/08= 10318

Number of oil changes and tire rotations = 2

Number of car washes = 1 (we're in a stage 4 drought here people, it's not my fault)

Tanks of gas = I have no idea; but not nearly as many as the Blazer and that's all the matters

Average miles per gallon = 46.3

Trips outside of the Triangle = 2 (one to Greensboro and one to Roxboro)

Radio stations on preset = 18 (6 are on AM though and who listens to that these days?)

Number of fun cubbies to put stuff in = 7 (one of which I just discovered a few weeks ago)

Number of good times with 'Lil Blue = 146 (If you're trying to do the math, I didn't drive him while I was in Utah!)

Book Thoughts

I throw my makeshift jai-namaz, my prayer rug, on the floor and I get on my knees, lower my forehead to the ground, my tears soaking through the sheet. I bow to the west. Then I remember I haven't prayed for over fifteen years. I have long forgotten the words. But it doesn't matter, I will utter those few words I still remember: La illaha il Allah, Muhammad u rasual ullah. There is no God but Allah and Muhammad is His messenger. I see now that Baba was wrong, there is a God, there always had been. I see Him here, in the eyes of the people in this corridor of desperation. This is the real house of God, this is where those who have lost God will find Him, not the white masjid with its bright diamond lights and towering minarets. There is a God, there has to be, and now I will pray, I will pray that He forgive that I have neglected Him all of these years, forgive that I have betrayed, lied, and sinned with impunity only to turn to Him now in my hours of need, I pray that He is as merciful, benevolent, and gracious as His book says He is...

--The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini

My feelings about taxes

(aka Declare the Pennies on Your Eyes!) Thanks woot.com for summing it up:

...The worst thing about taxes is that you’re supposed to compute the total yourself. What if you ate at a restaurant and when you said hey, what do I owe you? They said you figure it out. And you thought about what you’d eaten and said well, I guess that’d be about $7.25, and they said no, it’s $11.40. Plus now we’re going to charge you an extra three bucks for trying to cheat us. If they knew what you owed them, what was the point of making you figure it out? Just to be jerks, probably. Or maybe in hopes you’d miss high, which is basically how taxes work.

Except they’re a lot more complicated than restaurant menus! Income tax forms can stump even a brighter-than-average citizen. Find a pretty-good standardized test-taker in your workplace and ask him. If he gets frustrated, what are the rest of us supposed to do? Everybody’s supposed to pay taxes, but not everybody can make heads or tails of the forms. The IRS might as well administer a mandatory annual two-mile swim because let’s face it, this task is beyond the natural talents of lots of our fellow Americans....

I need people. Not a box. But I'm too cheap to buy people. Then again, the box cost about $60. Maybe I should get people. Can I go back to being a dependent???